The things he left behind Pt 3

These are the Things he left behind pt 3.

Nothing is more real than the feeling of reaching for his hand and feeling the ice-cold grip as rigor mortise set in yet once of the most painful was watching as his personal effects were bagged up to be thrown away once and for all. I felt a quiet sense of desperation and a desire to save whatever I could.

One of the things I held was about a dozen or so suit ties. My pops always had an impeccable sense of grooming. Whether it be the smooth polished black leather on his shoes, or the waves in his hair that he maintained meticulously. It frustrated me that he left eh house before I was old enough to really learn those skills from him. His shoes and cloths would last for years on end, and his suit jackets went right back into plastic covers whenever he took them off.

Meanwhile as I entered my teenage years, I struggled with an eczema fueled dandruff head that I just couldn’t figure out. Even the sensitive scalp head and shoulders didn’t do the trick. Using shampoo multiple times a week didn’t stop the flakes just dried my hair out. As much as I wanted to brush my hair and get waves like him the flakes discouraged me and sapped my confidence. Eventually I gave up completely and just let it grow out in a bushy mess. At least with my hair grown out the dandruff wouldn’t show through.

Flash forward back at home I lined the ties up across my bed and just looked at them. As I scanned the scene a flash of inspiration slipped through the heavy air. I had never been much of a suit person up to that point. As a super active individual, I preferred to wear clothing that I could move around in easily. I’d be quick to trade a pair of slacks for sweats and a heavy jacket for a hoody regardless of the season.

Prior to that point the only time that I wore suits on a regular basis was when I was working security at Peachtree Ballroom. I learned to get used to the feel but there wasn’t much to think about. Just all black everything. Seeing how I was in an office position at the time a step up in professionalism didn’t seem out of place and My dad passed down some pretty expressive ties. I walked out the door that first day with my head held high and the response I received ensured it would be a regular thing at least for the few months that followed.

It didn’t take me long to realize how intentional my father must have been about maintaining his garments. They were the only ties I owned so I had to wash them regularly and with them already having been through some years it wasn’t long before they began to wear and expose the stuffing inside. I went through a second heart break, knowing I did not possess the skills to maintain them and not knowing anyone in my immediate circle that I could turn to. I had a choice to either wear them out or put them away. I tried to push a little further thinking that if I handled them gently it would work out but pretty quickly, I was down to just a handful of ties.

Around that time, I bumped into a gentleman who needed a suit for a court case and did not know where to look. We had the same building so I decided I would give him mine. Not long after that I left that company In an effort to find greater alignment between my work and passion and find more of a career than just a great job and so that phase ended but the dreams and impact did not. I thought back to the days visiting different Fabric stores with my old friend Gabrae daydreaming about designing a line of ties for the Its Working progress brand.

Legacy is something I was always aware of yet it took on new meaning after my father’s passing, So I think it’s rather fitting that I now find myself in a Position directly related to maintaining legacy. I think it’s a great time to revisit that idea as well as to be intentional about gaining and sharing grooming expertise. You can look out for both of those things in the pipeline and thanks for reading this installment of “The things he left behind.”